Can I Kiss You? - Building a Culture of Consent and Respect with Mike Domitrz

Photo by William Stitt

Photo by William Stitt

In This Episode…

On the 80th episode of the Kickin' it with Daree podcast, Mike Domitrz, Founder of The Date Safe Project talks with me about building a culture of consent and respect when it comes to the way we treat each other in everyday relationships, including:

  • Why you should never tell your child to hug or kiss someone goodbye
  • The correct response to a survivor of sexual assault who confides in you
  • How assuming gender roles gets us in trouble
  • Modeling a culture of consent and respect in your own life 

Ways to Listen to this Episode:

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Key Points

Teaching people about boundaries when it comes to intimacy should start from an early age.  For example, telling a child to hug someone or give them a kiss when they don't want to is teaching them to give intimacy just because they are asked to instead of making their own choice to do so.

Sex education in the U.S. focuses more on what not to do (abstinence or avoiding pregnancy/disease) than what you should do.  People are not equipped with the communication skills to talk to their partners about what they want or how to give that to each other in a respectful, mutually beneficial way. That you have the right to say yes or no, because you should always have a choice.

People who push back when they hear survivors come forward do so because otherwise they would have to question themselves about the reality of the crime.  A survivor doesn't have to justify their story or their claims.


What You Can Do

Ask your partner what kind of intimacy they want with you and tell them what you want as well. Let them know that it's ok to ask or tell you what they want.

When a survivor has confides in you, instead of questioning their timing or testimony, thank them for sharing the personal details with you and offer to assist them with getting professional counseling.


Connect with My Guest

Mike Domitrz, Founder, The Date Safe Project

Date Safe Project




Everyday Mindfulness Show





Links and Resources


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