Explore More with Dawn Serra
In This Episode…
Dawn Serra from the Sex Gets Real podcast discusses the ways that communication and introspective questions can help us find out explore more about what is pleasing to us, and how to get permission to explore more pleasure from our bodies, and how to ask our partners to explore more with us.
Ways to Listen to this Episode:
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One of the ways that we hide our shame about sex is by performing—doing things we think are expected of us to do in certain ways. There's a huge disconnect between what people are constantly being told sex is [from culture, media and society] and their actual experience.
Sometimes it's hard to ask for what you want because it may hurt your partner's ego. There's a big tendency to avoid feeling awkward about it all, so we may shut down, ignore our own feelings of disappointment, or pretend it doesn't matter as much as it does.
Watching movies and porn is for entertainment, not education.
Instead of asking ourselves what we want and what brings us pleasure, we are more often forced to do things that others say are “the way” to find pleasure.
All emotions are valid.
Some view learning technique as a way to try to avoid awkward conversations.
“My body, my pleasure, my experiences—I'm not apologizing.” – Dawn Serra
Our body goes through changes as adults too—not just during adolescence. We can experiences differences in arousal, for example. Body changes should be viewed with disgust; claim your personal power. Feeling liberated is like nothing else. You don't have to apologize.
What You Can Do
Beautiful things can happen when we take risks and start to open up, even in the face of feeling possible shame and rejection. Nobody wants to be the one to “go first;” we need “permission” to ask for what we want and need when it comes to our sexual desires.
Being vulnerable with your partner is how you get to the deepest levels of intimacy.
Start with yourself. What do you want more of?
Things to ask yourself (and your partner):
What parts of your body to you like to be touched?
What does pleasure look like for you?
Connect with My Guest
Dawn Serra, Speaker, Coach, Podcast Host
Links and Resources
Explore More Summit – Free, 10-day annual summit begins March 8, 2017!